Havening Techniques

Havening Techniques® is a gentle, touch-based therapy that helps the brain release the emotional charge stuck in past experiences. It works with the body first, not just the mind. For clients who have found that talking about trauma has only taken them so far, Havening often opens a different kind of door.

At Simmeth Counseling Group in La Cañada Flintridge, we offer Havening in-person at our office and, for clients across California, in an adapted self-Havening form by HIPAA-compliant telehealth. We use it on its own and in combination with other trauma-focused approaches, depending on what your nervous system responds to best.

What Havening Is

Havening is a form of psychosensory therapy developed by Dr. Ronald Ruden. The word “havening” comes from an old English word meaning “to place into safety.” That is what the therapy is doing at a nervous-system level: signaling to your brain that this moment is safe, and using that signal to loosen the grip of memories that keep firing off as if the danger were still present.

The technique combines three things: gentle touch applied to the arms, palms, and face; imaginative or attentional exercises that occupy certain parts of the brain; and the client’s own recollection of a distressing memory, held lightly in awareness. Together, these produce a specific brainwave pattern (delta waves) that appears to change how the memory is stored. After a successful Havening session, the memory does not disappear. What changes is the emotional charge that came with it.

How Havening Works in the Body

The body remembers what the mind cannot always articulate. When a difficult experience happens, the emotional weight of it gets stored not just as a thought but as a nervous-system pattern. Later, something small can trigger the whole pattern to fire again, and the body responds as if the original event were happening now. Anxiety, panic, sudden anger, disproportionate fear: these can all be old patterns still running in the background.

Havening interrupts that pattern by pairing the memory with a specific set of physical signals of safety. The touch on the arms and face activates soothing sensory pathways. The distraction exercises keep certain brain circuits occupied. And in that combined state, the brain is thought to become more open to updating the way the memory is stored. The stored charge softens or releases.

Clients often notice the shift during the session. A memory that felt heavy at the start feels lighter or more neutral by the end. That change tends to hold.

What a Havening Session Looks Like

A Havening session usually runs 60 to 90 minutes. Here is roughly what to expect:

• We begin with what you want to work on. This might be a specific memory, a recurring feeling, a phobia, or a situation that keeps triggering an outsized response. You do not need to relive the memory in detail. We just need enough of a target to work with.
• We measure the current distress level. A simple scale (0 to 10) helps us track how the emotional charge changes during and after the session.
• The Havening touch begins. This is usually stroking of the arms from shoulder to elbow, rubbing the palms together, and gentle touch across the face. For in-person sessions, the therapist may guide the touch or teach you to do it yourself. Nothing invasive, nothing that would feel out of place.
• You engage in a light distraction exercise. Humming a song, counting backwards, visualizing walking up a set of stairs. This is not a test. It occupies certain brain functions while the emotional processing happens.
• We check in. Every few minutes, we check the distress level and adjust. Sometimes new material surfaces. Sometimes the original charge simply diminishes and we move on.
• We close with resources. Before the session ends, we install a positive emotional resource, a felt sense of safety or strength, using the same Havening touch. Many clients find they can return to that resource on their own later.

Between sessions, we often teach clients to use Havening on themselves. This is one of its unusual strengths: it is a therapy you can carry with you.

What Havening Helps

Havening has been used successfully for a wide range of concerns:

• Anxiety and panic
• PTSD and trauma-related symptoms
• Phobias
• Grief and loss
• Chronic stress
• Performance anxiety
• Emotional reactivity that feels disproportionate to the situation
• Distressing intrusive memories
• Nervous-system dysregulation

It is also frequently used alongside other therapies for clients who want a body-based tool for calming their system between sessions.

Havening by Telehealth

Because Havening relies on touch, many clients wonder if it can work remotely. The answer is yes, in an adapted form. In telehealth Havening, the therapist guides the client through the Havening touch on their own arms, palms, and face while walking through the memory work and distraction exercises together. Many clients find self-applied Havening deeply effective, and the added benefit is that they are learning a technique they can use anytime on their own.

Simmeth Counseling Group offers Havening telehealth sessions to clients throughout California.

How Havening Fits with Other Trauma Therapies

Havening is one of several trauma-focused approaches we practice. Depending on your needs, we may also draw on EMDR, Brainspotting, or Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART)®. Each of these therapies works with the nervous system, but they do so differently. Some clients find one modality clicks immediately; others benefit from combining approaches over the course of therapy.

Broadly speaking:

• EMDR uses bilateral eye movements and cognitive framing. Best for clients who can identify a specific memory or theme and want structured, protocol-driven work.
• Brainspotting uses a fixed gaze position to access deep brain-body connections. Best for clients who feel stuck in patterns they cannot fully articulate.
• ART combines eye movements with image rescripting. Best for clients who want rapid resolution and are comfortable with imagery-based work.
• Havening uses touch and distraction. Best for clients who respond to somatic input and want a technique they can eventually use on themselves.

We will help you figure out what fits.

Our Approach

Kay Simmeth, MA, LMFT is a Certified Havening Practitioner and has integrated Havening into her trauma work for years alongside her EMDR and Brainspotting practice. We use Havening the way we use all our tools: as a serious clinical technique held in a warm, unhurried therapy relationship. The touch is respectful and always at your consent. The pace is yours to set. The goal is not to power through hard material but to give your nervous system what it needs to actually release what it has been carrying.

For clients whose Christian faith is part of how they make sense of their lives, faith can be a resource in Havening work as well as in our Christian EMDR work. We are comfortable holding faith as part of the room when it is meaningful to you.

Getting Started

If you are curious whether Havening might be a fit, we offer a complimentary 15-minute phone consultation. You can call or text (818) 681-6627, email info@simmethcounseling.com, or visit our contact page to schedule.